Sunday, December 18, 2005

The Present Is the Opportunity to Change Your Destiny

Dear Lovely Peeps,

Detachment is such an important quality for anyone who wants to love.

The most important thing, though, is that detachment comes from pure love. You know that phrase we always hear? The one that goes, "If you love something, set it free..."

That's how we oughta live. Be it with lovers, friends, wishes, situations, things... You've gotta give Creation the time and space to create.

If we're constantly hoarding people, things, or circumstances we're not allowing them to reach their full expression. We're not giving ourselves the chance to find out the potential this has to be. We might be cutting our receiving short, and also our giving.

Think about it. How would you like to be loved? Would you like to be kept there by force, by a blind attachment? Or would you like to be soooo loved that you are sooooo respected, that even though you might be shown endless streams of adoring care, you are also given the chance to choose to be there? That no matter what you do, you will still be loved? That we could give up the doubts and just know that what the other says all the time is true and trust need not be questioned? (You can add more beautiful things to the list.)

I think that would be awesome. But that's not how we are in general, right? We tend to love conditionally (I love you as long as you love me. I love you as long as you say the truth. I love you as long as you treat me the way I want you to. I love you as long as you don't make mistakes. Etcetera...)

We tend to doubt our partners in sharing. We tend to manipulate each other- consciously or not. Some of us lie to get our way. Some of us remove our loving when things don't go the way we wanted them to, as some sort of punishment.

Earth to us: Are we really loving? Is it really impossible to change some of our ways and begin learning how to love more?

It would be unrealistic to expect ourselves to suddenly love each other the way we're loved by God, to suddenly be there no matter what for real, to suddenly love openly no matter what another person does to you. But I think in each moment we have the chance to be a little more like the part of the universe that's endlessly giving. In each moment we can choose to love a little better. Everyday we can learn to love a little more.

Of course, like everything else, this begins within ourselves. I wish us each the best in planting much inner love, so we have tons and tons to give... and not the need to take. Let's use the present wisely.

Muchow Love!


MAURO said...

es cierto. creo que realmente el problema esta en el miedo. miedo de darle tanta libertad a esa persona que finalmente se te va. miedo de que ese pedazo de tu vida siplemente "grows apart from u". I mean how can you consciously let someone you care drift away without puting up a fight. es posible que simplemente sea egoismo. la libertad definitivamente e importante pero sin confianza es imposible darla y mucho menos aceptar que la otra persona sigue siendo un individuo.

pd.: gracias por el chance de ser de alguna ayuda hoy.

MAURO said...

y de nuevo caemos en el "emotional hide and seek". esa especia de tortura y como yo lo llamo "chantaje emocional"

Chelle said...

thank YOU for ur willingness 2 give. :D

el miedo... agree. thing is, we all feel fear... but we can choose to face it and go beyond it and find out we're not going to die if that happens.

anyway, ALL relationships with other people are temporary. even if ur together til u die, it's still til one of the 2 departs. that's why detachment should be included in our loving.

claro que we have the right to fight for what we want. :) pero con el discernimiento uno se va dando cuenta ke conviene y ke no, y lo ke uno quiere va cambiando a medida ke uno va madurando.

y sips, definitivamente es chantaje emocional. sucks eso, really. pero gracias a dios hay quienes escogen ser de verdad y aprender de los errores del pasado.