You have learned to live a certain way. You have accepted that you are that kind of person. You are accustomed to a script you bought as real... but somewhere inside you, a voice is trying to make itself heard.
Through our experiences, received feedback or drawn conclusions we might have adopted some false beliefs about who and how we are. Some of these might even be marvelous ideas and ways of being and stellar standards, just not necessarily for us. Not everyone was born to fulfill the same mission, and with each passing day there is a strengthened need for you to find yours. You feel that time is running out and you want to make sure you contribute... but to what?
After accepting that you have an urge to discover where these inner nudges are directing you, the question becomes where to connect with this deeper, underlying truth. You know it's in there somewhere, you feel a certainty beyond what your logic comprehends. You even doubt it and wonder if you're just being silly. But even as you dismiss the notion that you are part of something grander, to go on instead with mundane everyday duties, you are secretly uncapable of giving up.
At this stage, you start questioning the worth of continuing to live the way you were taught to. Your focus grativates to a different set of more profound priorities. You develop a newer sense of respect for all beings. You let go of the trivial. You begin to trust life even when you don't understand it all, even if that means your concept of reality will be challenged and your world will be shaken. You feel you must be true to yourself and stop pretending. Your self acceptance gradually extends to every aspect of your existence. You start to graciously bring forth the real you.
And that... is a good thing.